3 THOUGHTS PER YEAR: a New Years resolution plan that sticks

Most New Years resolutions don’t stick.

Here we are, 17 days in.

If you’re struggling, it’s not too late to take a different approach. The cultural fortune and blessings, associated with proclaiming your resolutions aloud during the final countdown on December 31st, are lost. You get a 0-score for style/tradition points if you abandon your initial resolutions.

“No TRUE New Years resolution can start on January 17th!”

“Ok” [confidently brush your shoulders off].

Alas, this is a fact: a practice that works, started January 17th, is far greater than a resolution that started hot on January 1st and falls dead by January 22nd. 

Author and success expert, Carol S. Dweck, has a chapter in one of her books that talks about fulfilling your potential. In it, she writes, “Genius is not enough; we need to get the job done.” Liken that to your New Years Resolutions, and you might realize that the genius behind your initial plan is only as meaningful as the actions that (do not) ensue.

“Genius is not enough; we need to get the job done.” – Carol S. Dweck (Mindset: The New Psychology of Success).

There is no cure-all, but let me offer an idea that has helped me tremendously. Spoiler alert: this will be the only time that I downplay “taking action”.

I began this at the beginning of the 2017 year, and applied it again this year. It works. Here it is:

3 THOUGHTS PER YEAR

At the beginning of each new year, pick 3 thoughts, or topics.

WRITE THEM EVERYWHERE – walls, post it notes, desk drawers, phone background, desktop, bathroom stalls… you get the point.

They need to be extremely valuable for the upcoming year, but NOT ACTIONABLE (this seems counterintuitive, but is very important. I will explain shortly). Specifically, if it will help you most from Jan-Apr, then strongly consider it. I am a believer that the way you start dramatically influences your end results. If my 3 thoughts help me begin the year with 4 amazing months consecutively, then odds are that the last 8 won’t be too shabby either.

The purpose of these thoughts is not to formulate a one-size-fits-all action plan. The purpose is to change your overall approach. Consider it ‘mindset training’.

NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS FAIL BECAUSE YOU PICK SPECIFIC ACTIONABLE TASKS ON DECEMBER 31st THAT ARE NO LONGER EFFECTIVE ON JANUARY 17th.

This has had a greater impact on my life than any diet, habit, or gym membership. Why? It’s about the attitude that you approach each day with. It always is. Your plan has to be able to ADAPT to looming adversity and a sporadic schedule. Your standards, however, don’t have to change.

Carry these THOUGHTS or THEMES with you everywhere, and use them the way that people use W.W.J.D. bracelets. Use these thoughts as a lens through which you see the world. Let them be a filter for your tough decisions.

Carry these THOUGHTS or THEMES with you everywhere, and use them the way that people use W.W.J.D. bracelets.

You will still be tasked with making good choices that contribute to your well-being, that is non-negotiable. The difference? You can adapt your daily action plan to your surroundings as needed. You can fail daily. You can succeed daily. But no failure or success will dictate the following day’s approach, which will change dramatically, but always contain with it, your 3 thoughts.

Reward and punishment system based on preset expectations for action, exit.

Enter, 3 THOUGHTS PER YEAR that influence your EVERY move. It becomes ok to fall down on a diet or meal plan from time to time if the goal is to “improve your Nutritional Education” rather than to “eat 100% Paleo Approved foods”. Thus, taking failure frustrations and lack of motivation out of the equation, and narrowing your focus on how to address each issue/choice individually. More simply, change 3 ways that you think about your day.

Best wishes. Love you all.

 

Here are the thoughts that I chose last year. They served me well. 

2017 – Autonomy, Nutritional Education, Fearless

Here are the thoughts that I chose for 2018. So far, so good.

2018 – Critical Path, Composure, Blue-Chip


Thanks for reading, I know this was a long post. If this helps you in any way, please, share it with your friends. Talk about your 3 words. Link them to this article as backing. The more you discuss it, the more accountability you build for yourself.

I’d love to hear stories about your resolutions, both positive and negative. Maybe I will even share some on my SM or VLOG.

One Inch

Inches matter.

Take a single step.

Write down a late night thought.

Phone an old friend.

Read 2 pages in a book.

Drink 1 less beer.

Go to sleep 1 hour earlier.

If you can’t run a mile, run down the street and back.

If you can’t be joyful to everyone you interact with, just be joyful to 1 person each day.

Do not be intimidated by your ideals. Like a building is a culmination of bricks, your progress is a culmination of small choices. From where you are now, to the future you desire, is just a series of progressional inches.

It is easier to be consistent (which matters) when you don’t expect too much of yourself.

MANY INCHES > ZERO MILES

Inches matter.

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years go. The second best time is now.”

– Chinese Proverb

Love you all.

Jakob

 

5 Thoughts that People (who stress about family and travel) Should Keep in Mind Over the Holidays

This post is about: #family, #holidays, #stresstips  |  Read time: 3 min


If you have the perfect family, and the perfect life, disregard this blog and go enjoy your break.

If you’re like the majority, where dealing with family and travel adds some level of unnecessary stress over the holidays, this might help:

  1. MODERATION: Reminisce, indulge in laughter, stuff yourself with joy, but in all else, keep moderation in mind. “Too much” means something different to all of us, so be sound in your own judgement. People frequently regret eating too much, drinking too much, arguing too much, etc. The holidays are a time to relax your standards, but gluttony rarely results in happiness.
  2. COMPOSURE: Family can test your patience. Stay composed. Travel adversity can break you down. Stay composedNegative emotions multiply quickly. Stay composed.
  3. AUTONOMY: You are not your family. You are an individual part of your family. This should resonate specifically with young adults still struggling to find an identity of their own. You are not your parents. You are not your grandparents. Staying respectful and cognizant of your families culture is essential, but not at the cost of your own well-being. If it means renting an AirBnb instead of sleeping on a blowup mattress next to your snoring uncle, or sneaking out with your fiance for a drink when everyone else is bickering, TAKE CARE OF YOU FIRST! Unhealthy habits are NOT something that you need to partake in just because your family considers it normal. You do you. You can’t bring joy to others when, personally, you feel miserable.
  4. BE PRESENT: Put your phone away. Engage in conversation. Show some interest in people. You’d be shocked how much pertinent wisdom your family members can share with you. It feels good to detach from pop culture for a bit, really, it does.
  5. PERSPECTIVE: When you really think about it, holiday gatherings are the most (and maybe only) memorable times that you’ll have with family. Make the most of it while you can. At the end of the day, you have the luxury of going back to your own routine soon enough. Family is about sacrifice. Make others smile, even if it’s at your own expense. It’s not about you. We all fight our own battles. Showing empathy can give you great perspective with your family. Don’t boil over when you start to get heated. Put it on low and simmer down. Bite the bullet. Hold your tongue. Smile more. Even if it takes some fortitude, be the light for your family this holiday season. Odds are, some of them might be having as hard a time hanging out with you as you are with them 😉 You might even find common ground there, haha.  Spread love, I hear it’s contagious this time of year.

 

HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE

LOVE OVER EVERYTHING,